From GMA, saw the jamboree tower from afar and I decided to just walk rather than take a jeepney that ain't supposed to head straight to my destination.
Why take a ride together in the first place when you're never meant to go to the same destination anyway?! (Oooookaaay that's totally out of topic HA HA HA)
So yup. Walked from GMA. Passed these bars and cafe still looking abandoned at that time. Read from articles this place comes alive at night. No wonder. It was the usual city setting. The smell of piss, dog and human shits scattered on the pavements, the unfortunates begging for alms on the street...what's new?
Ate at a diner probably owned by a popular artist. Sorry not sorry, their service sucks. Order arrived too late. They actually forgot to cook my meal. If I didn't follow up, I would have starved for a long time. Take note there were few customers and they still missed my order, my already paid order 😑
Regardless, it still didn't stop that magical wonder whenever I'm on an unfamiliar place.
Party isn't my thing. When I found out there are no nearby interesting place aside from the scout tower whose history made me teary-eyed, I headed early to the venue of BLTX year 9.
Cozy place, nice folks who GET IT why people like me write...create, air-conditioned, multiple perspectives against the norms, kind seatmates, it was a promising start.
It became so crowded around 8-9 PM and that's only when I fully realized that this event is one of the biggest and well-known events in the zine/indie world...and I'm part of it.
Writing this down, I'm transported back to that very first zine event. An event I participated because why not, got nothing to lose but too much to share and give. The challenge is finding these people who are willing to risk their time and money to read ME.
Did you find them? Yes.
Did they make you happy? Yes.
Did they make you realize what is it like to truly live?
YES
I wouldn't be writing this, I wouldn't be confirming my attendance for Komiket 2020 if...I didn't feel something worth risking.
Going back to BLTX...
Reminders series was a hit. Vol. 2 & 3 sold out. As for vol. 1, sold quite a number compared to my previous fairs. Sold pieces out of every titles I have.
There's this guy who bought Reminders 3 probably because of song recommendations from All Time Low and Sleeping with Sirens, I approved 😆
Another shocking happening about Reminders 3 is the drawing...the scribble. People actually complimented those scribbles. Hopefully, they didn't say that just not to bruise my already wounded feelings (whaaaat 🙄) but my gut's telling me they are actually sincere.
There's this girl who stormed my area and bought my 2 poetry collections and the Burning Bright print. Gave her my other print for free because she's awesome!
There are orgs from my uni and every time people from UPLB meet each other, we're instantly friends! He pointed out my fake flowers decoration and was like,
"Really girl?!"
I replied,
"Why not? At least these don't wither at all."
Tired of shits that wither (really, Emina 😐)
One of the organizers bought the last copy of Reminders 2, saying she would love to have the last copy, sweet!
Also glad to meet these readers who found aesthetic and sustainability on the newsprint paper I used for my 2nd poetry collection.
There are others, couldn't clearly remember them all unfortunately, and I'm thankful for all of them. Overall, it was a fast-paced crowd. Crowds like this ain't usually for the kind of zine I produce. Still, there is a good number of strangers, fellow readers, and creatives, who bought my works.
In the end, went home satisfied. Tired, feeling sick, but inspired once again. New ideas are coiling and I'm excited to turn them all into reality.
There are things that don't make sense. Things creating doubts but...not even my worst nightmares have stopped me before once I've decided I'm going to pursue something.
Someday
I'll fully heal and find my missing pieces
Someday
One day
I'll make you smile
And you will make me feel
Someday
As certain as dawn and dusk
We will burn bright together
And finally
I will learn how to stay
Because you will never give me reasons
To leave
Someday
Someday.
